by 2 Cylivers
HAZARDOUS MATERIALS DATA SHEET
Element: Woman
Symbol: WO
Discoverer: Adam
Atomic Mass: Accepted as 55kg, but known to vary from 45kg to 225kg
Occurance: Large quantities in urban areas, with trace elements in most other areas.
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
- Surface normally covered in powder or paint film
- Boils at nothing, freezes for no apparent reason
- Melts if given special treatment
- Bitter if used incorrectly
- Found in various grades, ranging from virgin material to common ORE.
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
- Affinity to gold, silver, platinum and all precious stones.
- Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
- Explodes spontaneously, without warning or reason.
- Softens and takes a rosy glow when soaked in hot water.
- Greatly increased activity when saturated in alcohol.
- The most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
- Turns green when placed alongside a superior specimen
COMMON USES:
- Highly ornamental - especially in sports cars.
- Can be a great aid to relaxation.
- Very effective cleaning agent (sometimes).
TESTS:
- Pure specimens turn bright pink when discovered in natural state.
- Turns green when placed alongside a superior specimen.
HAZARDS:
- Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
- Illegal to possess more than one specimen (in most countries), although several can be maintained at different locations provided they DO NOT come into direct contact with each other.
NOTE:
Even the devil fears a woman.
