cylive.com | help | tour | contact | sign in | join Cylive
ContentCategoriesCommunity

Journals / Learning to Talk Like a Complete Idiot

Filed in: Arts and Entertainment

Tagged with journal, blog, thoughts,hearing, deposition, president, bill clinton, united states, usa, us, credit, idiot, learning, fun, funny, televised, congress, joke, jokes, hilarious

Last Modified Sep 18, 2008 at 06:17 AM PDT by jgarcia

Viewed 75 time(s)

Rated by 1 Cylivers

The credit belongs to the President of United States - remember, Bill Clinton's televised hearing...funny!

Viewed 75 times Commented 0 times AddThis Social Bookmark Button

rate this content

  • Email This!
  • add Add to my favorites
  • print Print or Export
  • Flag as inappropriate
  • Subscribe to RSS Feed
Search :
Filter results by: =
edit
Dad (D) - Son, come in here, we need to talk.
Son (S) - What's up, Dad?
Dad (D) - There's a scratch down the side of the car. Did you do it?
Son (S) - I don't believe, if I understand the definition of "scratch the car," that I can say, truthfully, that I scratched the car.
Dad (D) - Well, it wasn't there yesterday, and you drove the car last night, and no one else has driven it since. How can you explain the scratch?
Son (S) - Well, as I've said before, I have no recollection of scratching the car. While it is true that I did take the car out last night, I did not scratch it.
Dad (D) - But your sister, Monica, has told me she saw you back the car against the mailbox at the end of the driveway, heard a loud scraping sound, saw you get out to examine the car, and then drive away. So, again I'll ask you, yes or no, did you scratch the car?
Son (S) - Oh, you mean you think you have evidence to prove I scratched it. Well, you see, I understood you to mean did "I" scratch the car. I stand by my earlier statement, that I did not scratch the car.
Dad (D) - Are you trying to tell me you didn't drive the car into the mailbox?
Son (S) - Well, you see dad, I was trying to drive the car into the street. I mishandled the steering of the car, and it resulted in direct contact with the mailbox, though that was clearly not my intent.
Dad (D) - So you are then saying that you did hit the mailbox?
Son (S) - No sir, that's not my statement. I'll refer you back to my original statement that I did not scratch the car.
Dad (D) - But the car did hit the mailbox, and the car did get scratched as a  result of this contact?
Son (S) - Well, yes, I suppose you could look at it that way.
Dad (D) - So you lied to me when you said you did not scratch the car?
Son (S) - No. No, that's not correct. Your question was "Did I scratch the car?" From a strict legal definition, as I understood the meaning of that sentence, I did not scratch the car... the mailbox did... I was merely present when the scratching occurred. So my answer of "No" when you asked "Did I scratch the car" was legally correct, athough I did not volunteer information.
Dad (D) - Where did you learn to talk like a complete idiot?
Son (S) - From The President of the United States.

Comment on this content

Create, store, share and publish all your digital stuff

Sign Up » it's free

or learn more »

Journals

Create, share and publish your thoughts and comments on any topic using this content template

Related Stuff

  • Hilarious Bill and Hillary Clinton Jokes

    Never get tired of Bill & Hillary jokes...here are some more that I have collected over the years! You'll surely find them very funny!...

  • Is President Bush an idiot

    This topic is discussed and debated on the MSNBC show "Scarborough Country". The discussion is focused on Bush and his inability to be articulate....

  • Bill Clinton and the Lucky Frog

    Funny joke that explains why Bill Clinton doesn't lie!! :)...

  • Top 10 Bill Clinton Jokes

    These jokes were conceived during the aftermath of the Lewinsky scandal....and are hilarious, as usual!!...

  • Hillary Clarifies Who Would be the President

    Funny joke...Does that give any insight into Hillary's psychology? Maybe, there is more reality than comedy in the joke...

  • Bill Clinton Teaches Laloo Prasad Yadav English

    Funny joke...that's the power of the Bihari babu!...

  • An Ode to Bill Clinton

    Sung to the tune of "A few of my favorite things" from "The Sound of Music"...

  • Hillary Clinton Wakes up Bill

    Funny dig at Bill Clinton's shenanigans... and his propensity to drop his pants!...

  • Message for Clinton on White House Lawn

    Hilarious joke!!...

  • Presidents of United States

    List of all presidents of United States of America...

© Cylive 2006-2007 about | faq | tour | blog | feeds | terms | privacy | contact

User-created content, unless source quoted, is licensed under a Creative Commons Public Domain License